Stressball = weight gain

So here we are working on selling our house. We have an offer and the conditions need to be lifted by Wednesday. Well, I think that there is only 1 out of the 5 conditions that have been cleared!!! One of them is a problem with our water. It seems no matter what I do, it's not clearing. We don't drink it but the water should be perfect. It was perfect when we put the house up for sale back in April. Very odd that ALL OF A SUDDEN, it's not clear. I did another test this morning and my fingers are crossed, but something tells me it will come back bad again. I know, I know, positive thinking but it's hard these days. The buyer is also trying to work out his financing. He has the money from the sale of his house, but it will only be available April 2012. He's trying to work something out with his bank. Still no news on that one either! He's been working on it since the 14th!!!! That can't be good right? And of course the house inspection is "scheduled" for Wednesday as well. So needless to say that I am a BIG STRESSBALL atm.
And of course, I'm down about it all and not being with DH doesn't help. So my healthy meal making is all but non-existent (obviously any healthy eating is out of the question). Of course that means that I'm gaining weight like crazy. I had some great weightloss in July but then everything went downhill. I've gained about 7 lbs since then and it feels like 37! I'm bloated and feeling horrible. Some minor symptoms from PCOS are creeping back up as well.
With us wanting to work on baby #3 as soon as we live together again, this isn't the way to go to get there. We were very lucky with baby #2 that we had no medical intervention, but if I keep things going the way they are, we will be back to square one and seeking medical help for conception. I would rather not go this route.
I'm searching for the motivation to get back on the healthy meal train, but it's hiding really well this time. I know that I will have to do WW again to lose the weight. I will try the online version for the 3 month special. That should give me enough time to lose some weight and get ready for another baby. But again, that rests on us selling the house. So much is resting on this. Lots of prayers, fingers crossed and positive vibes. And if you have some that you can send my way too - that would be greatly appreciated :)

YAY for AF!!

So she came on her own again this month. I'm on CD4 today.
I'm very happy about this and I just hope that it keeps up for when we are ready to start to work on baby #2. With PCOS, you just never know. My cycle was a little longer last month than it has been in a while but only by 2 days. I'm hoping it's because it was my right side that released. My left side is pretty much a 35 day cycle. I'll just have to keep tabs on everything, just so that when we are ready to try again, I will already know how things look.
It's scary to think that we will be going down that path again. The ups and downs and countless times I will have to POAS. I am sure I will also worry about how it will all affect my lil princess. With another baby while she's young means that I will be taking away my time with her. But I think that may be more of a problem for me than for her. It's such a mixed bag of emotions.
DH is also looking into other opportunities, one of which means that he would be away from us for about 6 months. That's a long time. I know it would be for the greater good (the greater good*), but it would be tough. OK, I'm getting ahead of myself here. I still have some time before we start TTC, so until then, back to basics. Just gonna monitor my cycles :)


* I can't say the line "the greater good" without repeating it because of the movie Hot Fuzz. Just thought I would fill you in so you don't think I'm too crazy!!

She's here, she made it!

I'm glad AF is here. She arrived Monday morning. I would have been very happy if she didn't show and we were preggers. And I'm happy she's here as well. At least it means that my system is still working as it should.
So, I have to keep up with the vitamins and weight loss.
Hopefully, this will keep me regular and when it comes time to work on TTC again, we won't have the same issues as before.

A little worried - but I shouldn't be...should I?

My Dr had told me to start working on baby # 2 about 4-6 months after DD was born. I did have a regular AF at the beginning of Feb and I thought, yay, a normal period!! Because of the PCOS, I don't have regular AFs. Well, things got a little out of hand recently with DH and oops. Now because of the PCOS and no regular AF, I have no real way of knowing when I O'd. I was able to figure it out when we conceived DD because I was being monitored and was having a regular AF at the time of about 35 days. All this to say that I am now waiting for AF to show. Not too long ago, I dreaded when she made her appearance because it meant that another month was a bust on the TTC train. Funny how that is!!!
I'll be honest though, I'm a little nervous at any possibility of being preggers at this point. DH says it will be fine either way, we'll get through it. I know we would, but it would be crazy!
I'm still trying to wrap my head around starting to try again in a few months for another baby!! DD would be under 2 when the next baby arrives - if I'm not broken again. And of course, I worry about taking her time with me away from her. And putting focus on a new baby. It's all just so crazy!!
I'm getting ahead of myself here. I'll just take it one day at a time and focus on AF showing up any day now...any day now.

Going into week 33...

So I had a Dr.'s appt on Wednesday and it didn't go as well as I would have liked. I didn't gain too much weight for the first time in a while which is great. But my urine came back with a +1 glucose. The nurse asked what I ate for lunch - a chicken sandwich. Then when I went into the Dr.'s office, he asked the same info. It wasn't the sandwich that did it. So he is concerned.
I have already gone through the glucose test and it came back fine - no GD for me. He said we'll see how it is on your next visit.
Then he took my blood pressure. Again he wasn't happy. He says that it has been consistently high these last few visits and he may have to put me on meds. Then he said that he's sending me to have an U/S because he's curious to see how the baby's growing. This is when I became a pack of nerves. Lucky for me, my DH happened to be with me for this visit. The baby's heartbeat was fine and I still feel the lil monkey kick a lot. So I guess we'll see.
The Dr expected the high blood pressure/pre-eclampsia because of the PCOS. I didn't mention to the Dr that I get a lot of headaches lately. I've been chaulking it up to the BP issue before he even said anything.
Work is starting to stress me out because I am the only one who does my job and they don't know who is going to replace me. So, I haven't trained anyone yet. My last day is the 21st of November. My boss is going to be gone for 2 weeks soon as his wife is due any day. So I'm very stressed. I'm sure this doesn't help my cause.
And I can't believe the knee and ankle joint pain that I feel now. It has been a week that I am woken up by this incredible ache. I can sleep maybe 3 hours in a row then I have to sit up and rub my knees and ankles. Then I have to walk around. It's so painful. I don't know how I'm going to last another 5 weeks of work.
But then again...it's only 5 more weeks of work.

Dang that PCOS!!!

So the symptoms are back. I have been off the Metformin for 5 weeks and I feel the difference. I'm not complaining, that's for sure. I am just surprised that they came back. Everything I had read about PCOS is that once you lose weight, your symptoms fade and even go away. Not the case for me I guess.
I feel like I'm blowing up. And it's hard to say if it is baby or if it is PCOS. I would like to say baby - so for now we will stick with this :)
I have my 2nd OB appointment on Tuesday, so I am looking forward to it. My DH will be able to come with me again, which I love. We aren't sure if it will be another US or just the heartbeat. Either way, it will be great to hear/see Baby Hammie again.

On another topic, we did the coolest thing today. My MIL called this morning and invited us to the airport (it's a little local one - nothing commercial), where they were offering an all you can eat breakfast outdoors and then if you wanted to, you could sign up and take a spin in a little Cessna. So my DH and FIL took a spin. Neither of them have flown, so they were ecstatic!!! They said it was crazy fun. It was a gorgeous day out here for it. So cool, when I lived back in the city, I don't think there was ever something that cool to do!! Yay for the country life lol.

Another ultrasound!!!

So May 20th was our first prenatal visit. It was great. I live in a small town and I guess they don't see too many situations like mine since the nurse/receptionist was so excited to see me. She said that she was so glad to see the referral come through from the RE. That was nice to hear!
Stepped on the scale to see the damage of not following Weight Watchers and believe it or not, I lost a pound. I will have to update my weight loss ticker lol.
We were the first appointment for Dr. E and he was another surprise. He was over the moon about us being pregnant. Hubby and I couldn't get over how genuinely excited he was for us.
So we talked about what we had seen with the RE and he said he wanted to see for himself. HUH?!? I wasn't expecting an ultrasound in his office!! So needless to say we were both giddy to have another glance at Baby Hammie. So it was a full house for this movie - myself, hubby, Dr. E, medical student sitting in and the nurse. It was a nice sight. The baby measured 11 weeks yesterday - about 3.78 cm. We saw the little heart beating like crazy - awesome. We were also able to see arms and legs. What a relief to know that everything is still moving along.
We talked for a bit afterwards and he has put in the high risk catagory for my pregnancy. He basically said that he will be monitoring me closely because of how long it took us to get to this point and also because of the PCOS, I am at a higher risk of developing high blood pressure and then of course once he found out that both my mother and grandmother had high blood pressure, he said that doesn't help either.
He basically told my hubby to pamper me. :) I know he will.
Dr.E has put my EDD at Dec 11th. So I guess we'll see :)

We have decided to do the IPS screening offered in Ontario for Downs, Trisomety 18 (?), and neural tube defects. I told the Doc, no amnio. And he agreed. But we are going to do the u/s and b/w to see if there is anything off. This way here, we can prepare ourselves if anything. The wait for the results is going to be tough, but if we don't do it, it would be even tougher.

On another note, my hubby sees a specialist today for his foot. He has an appointment with an orthopedic surgeon. I won't be able to take him but I'm sure all will be fine. He's still hobbling around with crutches. The wonderful colours are coming out now - the blues, purples and greens. I think that's a good sign - things are healing.

Just not feeling it

So tomorrow morning, we are going to take a test. I'm pretty sure it is going to be a BFN but I have to take it to be sure. I feel like I'm tumbling backwards. This no period thing is taking me back to before I was dx with PCOS. I just hope that the RE doesn't have us start all over again. I think if that were the case, I would take some time off from the whole TTC job. Yes I said job. That is what it is starting to feel like and it shouldn't.

I did have a great weigh in today at Weight Watchers. I'm down another 1.5 lbs. 19 lbs to go until goal weight! Maybe by the end of summer I will have reached goal.

Going to try and relax tonight if I can...will be back tomorrow with the outcome. Although I'm pretty sure already :(

Oh and I'm making weight watchers lasagna tomorrow and some no bake lemon cheesecake squares (only 3pts!).

Well, here it goes!!

So here is my first post with Blogger!
I want to share my ups and downs of TTC, PCOS and weight loss. I will also try to share some low-fat/cal recipes that I have tried.

I am trying to lose the weight that I have put on in the last few years. I joined weight watchers on Nov 24 and so far I have lost a total of 39lbs. So I am very excited about that!! 25lbs to go to reach goal weight!
Since losing the weight, some of my PCOS symptoms have gone away. What a bonus.
Now I'm hoping that the weight loss will also help us to conceive.
I am currently on a break from the Serophene and follow ups until April 3rd when my RE will hopefully give us the A-OK to get back on. I have hemorrhagic cysts that must heal before we try again, so I am crossing my fingers that all is good. And if it is, we will also start the Ovidrel. Nothing but good things to come!
But I am still secretly hoping that this month, since I am not being poked and drugged, maybe, just maybe, I will ovulate on my own and we will get pg.